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Writer's pictureIAN D FLEMING (PGcert 2021)

Giving My Presentation

22rd Jan 2021


Time to reflect on the situation re a) taking this PgCert under contractual obligation b) how that's affecting my workload ... or certainly how the workload is effecting my studies! and c) how much empathy suddenly being a student is fuelled in me as tutor towards my students!


Midweek - in the thick of a hectic week of teaching, unit leading, pastoral issues, managing a big student submission, etc etc I had planned my week around getting my required submission of a live presentation created and finalised for Friday. So Wednesday I cleared (or so I'd thought) my afternoon, set auto-replies on my emails, shut Outlook down and got on with it. On first tutorial with Rahul, over a week before, I came away feeling more relaxed and assured re doing this PGCert. I was inspired ... had an idea for my presentation, ran away with it (as is my usual style) and - very uniquely for me - scripted a 5 minute presentation on who I am, what teaching means to me etc ... neatly wrapped up in a theme of what would my 16 year old self say to my now 56 year old self. A neat script. 5 drafts. rehearsed read to screenwriting co-tutor Mark, more timed reads and then building of a flashy powerpoint of 26 slides. I get to being almost finished and think 'I'll finalise this tomorrow and we'll be laughing.' Turn my Outlook back on to see an email from students I'd meant to be having a vital tutorial with!!! I hadn't checked my calendar! Distracted ... desperate to impress on the presentation and to start knuckling down to this PgCert and BANG! I'm back in Fury-land that it has yet again seemed to get in the way of my duties! Duties I take very seriously and am committed to ... and ... most pertinently that I have never before missed like this. I'm embarrassed, angry at myself ... everything that I expect others may feel. It's no big deal in the grand scheme of things and the students were fine and we instantly rescheduled. But it really got my back up. Then ... the real fun started. I go into all the emails I've been getting from Rahul re tomorrow's presentation ... the ones I've diligently tucked away in a special folder on my Outlook ... y'know? The ones that then don't get seen. And BIGGER BANG! I've screwed up.


REFLECTION - note from tutor self to student self READ THE DAMNED BRIEF!!!! Just like you impress over and over again on your students! I'd run away with the notion of something Rahul had said to me (supportively) in my tutorial, got my idea and run with it, simply forgotten emails were there ready to read and ... well, there's no excuse. I felt stupid, embarrassed and annoyed. I am a really diligent tutor. Why do I then not have that same diligence as a student? Well give n my presentation was about my personal journey ... growing up and being a musician, becoming a mature student, filmmaker, teacher - starting with the lippy perspective of my 16 year old anti-authority, rebellious self ... well; let's just say I realised that kid is still in here somewhere.


I almost decide to send in an excuse - but no. What would I tell any student of mine to do? OK, you've missed the mark of the brief, but you've worked hard, you have something to present - suck it up and present. You can't fail if you submit. So after a frustrating half hour of trying to get in the session (this staff/student id crossover issue on Moodle is driving me nuts!) I did. It went well. Nice comments and yes, as ever I did it with my usual level of performance energy (if a little faster). But I did feel uncomfortable and embarrassed after watching presentations by those in the group who had followed the brief. Mine taught people nothing ... just how I got to where I am. It was entertaining but on reflection it was all my personality pushed to the max. This is a BIG part of my teaching style, the force of my personality commands a packed lecture theatre - or online session, and yes, I inform and entertain. BUT ... in the context of today, I felt I probably inspired and intimidated in equal measure. My 'dazzling', slick, sped-through performance - so far away from the brief I'd be giving it a D - blinding the room for a moment? Yes ... even the guy who had to follow me said 'Wow. Try following that. Thanks Ian'. But he gave a presentation within the brief, maximum 5 slides, read an article and comment, bring an object, etc' The only object I brought was my Self! He raised points that brought about discussion. He educated. I entertained. And that's what I felt with all the presentations I heard. 'To the brief ... informative ... raised points to discuss.'


NOTE TO SELF : yes: prep is everything; yes: this is all getting in the way of my work (or rather the other way round), but ... it has to be done and ... like everything else I pride myself on ... it has to be done well, with humility.


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